Feelings can be so deceptive sometimes.
Sometimes it feels like God just wasn’t looking, He was not paying attention, or was busy with some other task. Feelings tell me that the harm that befell girlie was somehow out of God’s realm of protection. Like God allowed special needs to enter my family during a momentary lapse in God’s protection, like a dropping of His guard, loss of protection for that moment.
I know from research and from girlie’s history, she not only has a genetic condition, but one that is made worse with any vaccines (due to the large amount of toxins in vaccines). Each set of vaccines she received, she regressed, until with the 6 month vaccines her development stopped, seizures and chaotic brain waves became the norm for her and has never been cured.
Where was God during those vaccines?
Right there. Right there in the room. Right there holding my girlie.
** Stick with me on this discussion :), I get a little long winded ! **
A quick word study on “protect” in the Bible leads to some pretty interesting observations. In the old testament, “protect” is the Hebrew word “shamar” which means “to keep, to watch, to guard” and is used often times in respect to a garden or a flock. It also means “to hedge about with thorns”. [think about that for a minute – Does a gardener leave his garden unprotected from bugs and pests and disease? Nope. Does a shepherd ever leave those sheep unprotected? Nope.]
This word is used in Psalm 91:11 “For He will give His angels charge concerning you,
to guard you in all your ways.” All of Psalm 91 discusses the Lord’s protection for those who follow Him. Protection is listed in images as “refuge”, “shelter”, “fortress”, “under His wings”, a “shield and bulwark”. Protection is given because He loves me, vs 14, He will answer me, vs 15, He will be my salvation, vs 16. I don’t have to be afraid of anything – and the Psalmist gives an entire list of things I don’t have to fear – night terror, enemies, the wicked, being trapped (“snare of the trapper”), sickness, and disease.
In the new testament, the word is “phylassō”, which means “to guard a person (or thing) that he may remain safe”. In 2 Thessalonians 3:3, God’s protection and His faithfulness are mentioned together: “the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen and protect you from the evil one.”
Catch that? God is BOTH faithful and will protect us!
So, that is it right there – God’s protection never left BECAUSE of His faithfulness. He has a hedge around my family. My family can shelter in the wings of the Almighty that He provides for us every minute, every day, every year.
God’s protection is always there because He is faithful.
So, I believe something pretty crazy in regards to all that I have read about God’s protection – girlie’s special needs is a protection in and of itself.
From what? I am asking and you might be too.
I have no way of earthly knowing what that might be.
Could be a protection against self, and desires of this world, we surely would have a great deal more time for those things without special needs?
Could be a protection against loss of closeness with and direct, every second, trust in God?
I suspect that one day we will know. God will reveal it. Until then, my trust remains.
I trust that God has my good and the good of my family in the forefront of His thoughts in our journey. He is protecting us in this journey and will never ever leave our sides.
P.S. word studies found in www.blueletterbible.org, and all scripture is NASB.