The 3rd child

Thought you all might like this story.  It always reminds me of God’s faithfulness and steadfastness.

Sean and I always wanted 3 children.   Aidan came along after about 2 years of infertility and we were so thankful.   When Aidan was two, we had Gwendolyn thinking that the timing was perfect for siblings to be able to play with each other.   As you probably already guessed that sibling time never happened.

Girlie’s development slowed and stopped with each set of vaccines.   Right after her 6 month vaccines her brain waves became chaotic and she began having seizures.

We were told that what Gwendolyn had was genetic and we had a 25% chance of having another child like her.  As you can imagine that scared me, not just a little, it scared me a lot!  I was not going to go through this again with another child biologically   Nope – I was determined we would adopt to have the third child we had always wanted.

We started looking for ways to adopt.  International seemed to be out because both of us could not be away from Gwendolyn that long, her care is rather intensive.   We could not adopt from an agency because they do not help families that already have children.   Private adoption through an attorney seemed the best route.   So we did a brochure on our family and mailed and handed out to family and friends in case they knew of a situation that might need an adoptive family, and also found an attorney we could file the brochure with and who could be contacted by a birth mom

In the meantime we ran across a local group that did international hosting, where we could be a blessing to a child from another country by hosting him in our home for 6 weeks.   So in the summer of 2009 we hosted a little boy from the country of Ukraine.  Adorable, loving, energetic, talented boy that was many times hard to handle and very strong willed.  Those were a hard 6 weeks but I learned something – every child has issues, unique issues, whether physical, behavioral, mental. 

All children have unique challenges, unique to them.

My fears of having another child completely vanished.  I trusted God and his plan for our family.  We became pregnant right away.  But God told me, in those early days while I was praying about this baby, “I will take this baby if something is wrong.”  He wanted me to know I could trust Him no matter what.

This passed week, 8 years ago, I miscarried our 3rd child.  God told me it was a girl.  Miscarriage is never ever easy, it is a pretty huge amount of emotional trauma.

But God proved He was faithful, and would not allow my family to have another special needs child.

The following year, we became pregnant again and now we have a growing, healthy, amazing little 6 year old, who loves God and others with his whole little self.  We can’t imagine our family without him.  He completes our family, bringing joy and laughter to many many days.

Several years after Lincoln was born, we found out (with the newest technology that was not available previously) that Gwendolyn’s seizures and developmental delay have a specific gene mutation that is “de novo” – meaning “new.”  Her condition is new to her, not from her dad and mom, and in no way meaning that we could have any chances of having another child with this genetic marker.

I had to trust and believe God, without knowing the truth until at a later time.

God is faithful.  He speaks and acts and works, usually different that we would want or expect.


2 thoughts on “The 3rd child

  1. Love this story! Your powerful faith reminds me of my friend Bridgette. Her second child was diagnosed with severe autism. (So severe, he had to be institutionalized in his 20’s when he grew too strong for her to handle.) She had eight more babies after him, ten children total. Not one was born with special needs. Her faith always amazes me, and so does yours! Thanks for sharing your story.

    Liked by 1 person

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